Why girls shouldn't play Zelda
by Mistress of Bishounen
Summary: A weird idea that came up after playing Ocarina of Time with a friend. Read and Review, or else the Gorons will get you.


Mistress Bishounen: Well...here I am writing my first video game related fic. Umm...based on the title alone, I'm pretty sure you all know that this is a Zelda fic. This whole thing started yesterday when my friend and I were playing The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time...yep, we hadn't beat the game yet. I just beat it yesterday, so sue me. Actually, don't sue me, I have no money to give you or anyone else. Of course...you can always give me money, that's encouraged.

Anyways...my friend and I were both playing Zelda while talking on the phone, and she had said something about her tunic matching her shield and whatnot...which led me to saying that this is why girls shouldn't play Zelda. Of course, I was joking when I said that, so please, don't think I'm the type who believes that girls should only play crappy Barbie games. Well, after I said that, this really random discussion came up...and that led me to writing this fic. So read, enjoy, and don't take any of it seriously.

One last thing. A/N means authoress note.

Moving on...

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

**Why Girls shouldn't play Zelda: Chapter 1 **

Link(A/N: Kid version) and Saria are in the Sacred Forest Meadow, sitting outside of where the Forest Temple is. Saria and Link are talking to each other about random everyday things. Saria is speaking, but Link's thought's begin to wander. _I wish Saria would dye her hair, it doesn't match the outfit she's wearing. I mean, her hair is green and so is her dress, but her hair is a different shade of green... _Link thinks. "Umm...Saria" he begins, interrupting her in mid-sentence. Saria raises an eyebrow in concern "What is it Link?" she asks. He blushes a bit, and speaks again "Well...this has been bugging me for a while now, but I've never gotten around to telling you..." Saria interrupts " Link, if this about the time you accidentally set the Deku Tree on fire..." Link gasps, and frantically waves his hands around in panic "Shh! I told you not to talk about that anymore. Besides, the bomb only got stuck between the Deku Tree's branches because the wind blew it over there after it was thrown..."

Saria sighs "Link...I know it was an accident, so don't worry. Anyways, is that what you wanted to talk to me about?" Link begins to blush again. "Umm...no..." Saria raises an eyebrow, this time in confusion "Well, if that's not what you wanted to talk to me about, then what was it?" Link blushes a deeper shade of red, then speaks "Well...it's about your outfit...it doesn't match..." Saria gasps, looking down at her outfit. "What do you mean my outfit doesn't match? It's green, and so is my hair" Link sighs, and speaks. "Well...that's the problem. Your hair is a different shade of green, and it throws the whole outfit off. I really think you should dye your hair a darker green or something" he replies. Saria continues to look at her outfit, then pulls on a strand of her hair and looks at it as well. This continues for about five minutes, with Saria looking from her outfit to her strand of hair, and back again.

She finally speaks "Wow, you're right Link...my hair doesn't match my outfit. I guess I should dye it...umm...how about red?" Link ponders this for a moment, then replies "Not red, that color doesn't go with green too well. Umm, I think you should just get a darker green, then wear gold earrings to bring out the color of your eyes" Saria looks at Link with a stunned expression, then speaks "You're absolutely right Link, thanks. I never knew you were good with these kind of things." Link looks away from Saria in embarrassment, and speaks "Umm... you're welcome" She smiles, and replies "Well, is that all you wanted to tell me?" Link nods his head in response. "In that case, let's get out of here, it's about time we got back"

As the two are leaving, Saria speaks "Link, I know you don't want to talk about it, but I have to ask, why were you next to the Deku Tree throwing a bomb?" she asks.

Link looks at Saria with an annoyed expression, and replies "Well...I was trying to throw the bomb at Navi, she(A/N: I'm going to assume Navi is female, but if I'm wrong, just correct me.) was getting on my nerves when she kept telling me really obvious things that I already knew." Saria nods in understanding "Ohh, that makes sense...I once tried to drown my fairy by throwing it in a pond, but all it did was fly out of the water...what?" Link is now looking at Saria with a "what the heck" expression, but only shrugs. _After saying that, I think Saria should dye her hair blonde..._he thinks.

**End Chapter 1**

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

Mistress Bishounen: Well, that was chapter 1 of my "Why Girls shouldn't play Zelda" series. It was short, but this was just a preview of what's to come. Of course, some reviews would definitely motivate me to work harder... hint hint Speaking of reviews, constructive criticism is always welcome. I'm trying to improve my writing, so that would be very helpful.

Anyways...this fic doesn't really deal with the storyline of the game, but there may be events that kind of have something to do with it, such an encounter with Ganondorf or the like. This is all for fun anyways, so that shouldn't be too much of a problem.

Besides all of that, I want to thank my friend Maria for inspiring the whole idea of Link with a fashion sense...or whatever you want to call it. So blame her, not me...even though I did contribute to the conversation that led to the writing of this fic, it's all her fault...and if you want to tie her up and torture her, she lives at 1234 Goron Road on Death Mountain.


End file.
